Learning Disabilities

Stress and learning disabilities

First and foremost, a proper diagnosis is imperative. As many as one third of children/teens/adults that are diagnosed with ADD, Attention Deficit are tragically misdiagnosed. 

Their tantrums, fidgetiness, self-abuse and inability to pay attention may, in fact, be depression.   

It is important to get a person properly diagnosed, then move from there.

According to The National Center for Learning Disabilities:

Most parents feel alone and confused and don't know where to look when thinking that their child may have a learning disability or "difference."   They are often overwhelmed.

Their pediatrician or a trained social worker, or psychologist can guide them through proper testing.  It is often done through their school system or privately.  A proper diagnosis is the key to getting on the path towards success in school and with relationships.

What Are the Education Options?

Although obtaining a diagnosis is important, even more important is creating a plan for getting the right help. Because a learning disability affects not only the child, it also affects the entire family. 

Assistance may be needed on a variety of fronts: educational, medical, emotional, and everyday experiences such as friendships, sports, etc.

In most ways, children with learning disabilities are no different from children without disabilities. At school, they eat together and share sports, games, and after-school activities. 

But since children with learning disabilities do have specific learning needs, private schools often do not or can not provide the assistance the children need.  Most public schools provide special programs. It is up to you to find the right environment that suits your child.

Schools typically provide special education programs either in a separate all-day classroom or as a special education class that the student attends for several hours each week.

Some parents hire trained tutors to work with their child after school. If the problems are severe, some parents choose to place their child in a special school for the learning disabled.   There are many out there.  Just do your homework.

Learning Disabilities, Dyslexia, ADD, ADHD

According to two of the world renown experts on learning disabilities, Dr. Thomas Viall of The International Dyslexia Association and Yale researcher, Dr. Sally Shaywitz,

It is possible to not only cope but to thrive and succeed! 

The one common link with children and adults diagnosed with a learning disability is that person and those that are involved in their life are under a significant amount of stress.  

Awareness of what you are feeling, and learning to express those feelings in a healthy way is the key to help all of you maintain a normal, happy, and yes a successful life.

How can you help your child/teen or yourself cope with the stress of living everyday with a learning disability? 

Coping appropriately is the key

“Success is the ability to go from
 failure to failure
 without losing your enthusiasm and determination."

                                   - Sir Winston Churchill

What are the symptoms of a learning "difference" disability?

There are many varieties of learning disabilities.  For more in depth information, feel free to contact The International Center for Learning Disabilities. 

Common symptoms of ADD (without hyperactivity may include):

difficulty solving problems and coping
spontaneity, not thinking of consequences
difficulty with time management
procrastination
distraction, forgetful, lose things
disruptions in sleep patterns
difficulty with motivation and following through
difficulty in work, school and job
difficulty with relationships 
messy

  Symptoms of ADHD may  include the following:

• hyperactivity, rebellious, angry, controlling, easily irritated.
   
• Behavior is often impulsive and may sometimes daring or unpredictable to the point of dangerous.

Stubborn, talk too much, easily frustrated.

Difficulty with coping skills, feeling overwhelmed
Impatient, destructive behavior to self or family. 
Difficulty adapting to change. 

Often parents hear " I hate school, and I'm not going back!"

It is important for the child/teen or adult to be comfortable with expressing their feelings rather than holding them inside and getting more and more angry and overwhelmed.

Responses such as "I know this must be frustrating allows open communication", rather than shutting them out.

Physical symptoms

When a child is concerned about  school, it can affect their entire body. 

A child/teen who feels stressed about school might have many symptoms such as headaches, stomachaches, or even a feeling of having to throw up.

Having trouble sleeping is also a common symptom.   

Becoming aware of what they are feeling and then talking about it and working through it is the key to balancing their lives.  This is where the use of Guided Imagery has been so instrumental in allowing the child to feel that they aren't alone and teaches them positive coping skills that will last them a lifetime.

Sometimes, taking yourself "mentally" or physically out of the situation and putting yourself in a calming relaxing setting, even if just in your imagination can work wonders.

In any situation, but most importantly when there is a learning "difference:, " we must realize that every single person on this earth has weaknesses.  But more  importantly, we all have our own strengths.

Focusing on the strengths is where Guided Imagery is of significant impact.

Guided imagery helps a person, child through adult identify their feelings and by the way of the words on the story work through them, and let them go.

Everyone has stress in their lives.  Stress doesn't necessarily have to be bad. 

It is how we "choose" to respond or react (or not react) to that stress or our feelings that matter.

Again, when feeling frustrated, angry or overwhelmed, the key is coping and acting appropriate. 

You are in charge of how you want to act and react.

Life doesn't have to be so stressful, it can and should be fun!

There isn't a person on this earth that doesn't deal with some sort of stress everyday in their lives. 

Everyone deals with issues including family, friendships, school, work related issues, illnesses and more. 

As Rick Lavoie quotes in his new book It's so much work to be your friend, he states the most painful part of loving and supporting a child with learning disabilities is feeling so helpless when we watch them struggle with social isolation and rejection."

Teaching children/teens/adults how to interact successfully is the key.

Living with a Learning Disability

A person living with a physical or learning disability such as Dyslexia, ADD, ADHD have many additional pressures put upon them. 

A person with a learning disability "'feels different". 

They feel that other people don't understand what they are going through. 

They are frustrated, angry and confused.  Life to them is overwhelming at times.

People with learning disabilities tend to
 lack appropriate coping strategies for dealing with stress.

This may be caused by a delay in cognitive development.   In other words, people  with learning disabilities are less likely to recognize that they have a problem for which they need help.   (Geisthardt & Munsch, 2002).

Unfortunately, many people with learning disabilities often rely on denial or being the "class clown" as a strategy for coping with stress. 

They have a greater incidence making quicker more spontaneous decisions, and choices.  Often dangerous ones. 

• smoking, alcohol, drugs, sex

• split second decisions that they don't think out the consequences

• they just live for the moment and "react".  To the detriment of themselves, and others.

 **** Ultimately, they just want to feel and be treated like everyone else.

It is important for those around them realize... that the anger, frustration and often acting out is really just their way of expressing their feelings.  Don't take it personally. 

Be there unconditionally to listen, love, understand and care.

Stress and Learning Disabilities:

The stress of having a learning disability is overwhelming.  People, friends, family don't understand what it means.  They are often treated differently and unfairly. 

There are the emotional feelings of fear, worry, and being embarrassed.   There are often physical symptoms such as headaches, stomach aches, insomnia. 

Often a person with LD is so nervous, they:

1.   rush more, leading to careless errors. 
2.   miss important details or deadlines.
3.   are embarrassed so they rush and make wrong responses on tests.

The goal for dealing with the stressors of LD is stress management. 

Guided Imagery has shown to be one of the most successful tools for  stress management.

                                       For Children/Teens:

Guess what?  You are not alone.  There are plenty of resources out there.  You can have help with choices about school, support and social skills.  The important thing is that you ask for it. 

                                        For Adults

Managing a learning disability is a lifelong effort. You can make it, you can do anything that others can do.  You just have to learn what way works best for you. 

                                   Overcoming Obstacles

Learning disabilities can cause problems at work.

If you have experienced problems at work due to your LD, you may be worried about the possibility of losing your job.

Again, taking time to quiet your mind and busy lifestyle is so important.

Guided Imagery for adults with LD has been shown to make a remarkable difference in their personalities and self confidence.

Rather than focus on the negative, realize your strengths. 

Put your energy there.  Be the person that sees the glass as half full rather than half empty.

You know your strengths.  Make a list:

1.  Are you an extrovert or introvert?  That is important because each type of person learns and works in their own way.  Both are correct, just be yourself.

2.  What are the things that you are good at?
2.  What are the things that make you most happy?
3.  You have many gifts. 

Put your attention on your strengths.

There is hope

Guided Imagery gives a person back Courage, Strength and Hope.  Yes, there is hope, many of the most successful people in the world had major challenges in their lives.  They didn't give up.  (Our most recent c.d. of the same name, has sold over 3000 copies the first month).

It is important to realize that 1/7 people actually have some sort of learning disability.  It has nothing to do with intelligence. 

People with learning disabilities just have to find ways to learn in ways that work best for them.   As mentioned above with Dr. Cosgrove, many successful people have been diagnosed with a learning disability.  To name a few: 

• Winston Churchill
• Albert Eienstein
• John F. Kennedy, Former President
• Henry Ford, Former President
• George Washington, First President
• Leonardo Da Vinci
• Thomas Jefferson
• Charles Schwab
• Thomas Edison
• Walt Disney
• Nelson Rockefeller
• Picasso
• Leonardo Da Vinci
• Henry Winkler
• General George Patton
• Alexander Graham Bell
• Dr. Delos Cosgrove, Chairman of The Cleveland Clinic Foundation
• Steven Spielberg, and countless others

They key is to find out the way that you learn best, then go for it!

The use of guided imagery is one very powerful and helpful tool for children/teens (their parents) and adults.  I urge you to try them, 

They can change the child/teen and your family in ways beyond imagining.

Guided Imagery is an excellent way for a person to learn to come to grips with their feelings and then learn ways to work through them and move forward in life. 

Well documented research has shown that the use of guided imagery can reduce test anxiety and improve test scores.

Wachelka D, Katz, RC showed in a well documented research study  that the use of guided imagery

• reduced test anxiety and improved  academic self-esteem in students with learning disabilities. J Behav Ther Exp Psychiatry 2000;Sep, 30(3):191-19